It was a cool September morning. While holding the
camera, anxiously waiting for my daughter to appear, I cheered for runners of
various ages as they crossed the finish line. I started thinking about running
a half marathon. Why not? I could be one of these people coming through finish
line.
I took many pictures of my smiling daughter and I
was proud of her for training on her own and accomplishing her goal.
My daughter and I have been running for a few years
as a regular part of our work outs and have been motivating each other. We also
had done a couple of 5K races. But none of us really thought of running hard
core races like half marathons or marathons. This past spring, my daughter
asked for “The Competitive Runner’s Handbook” by Bob Glover and Shelly-lynn
Florence Glover, started training for her first half marathon, and successfully
completed the race.
When she heard that the London Lady’s Half Marathon
was being held in November in London, she registered herself as a runner and I
told her to register me as a walker. I am a very fast walker and have done very long distances.
After being a spectator of a very exciting ½ marathon race, I no longer wanted
to walk but to run. I sent an email to the organizers of the race
and requested the change. The reply came that my race was changed from walk to
run.
I was extremely excited. I copied my daughter’s
previous training with some adjustment as I only had 7 weeks left to the race.
I also emailed the organizers letting them know I was interested in their free
training program. We had speed training on Wednesdays and long runs on Sundays.
In between, I continued my own training which included yoga, circuit training,
and shorter runs. September 18th was my first time with the group
and I really enjoyed it. It was great to be part of a team and receive
feedback. The group was composed of people of various ages and abilities. Some
were pro marathon runners, some pro half marathoners, and some were like me -
this being their first half marathon. Then came the Sunday long run and I was
extremely nervous. I ran my very first long run of 10K the day before my
birthday this past August. Then another day I had ran 12K. I started running
with the group and there were a couple of experienced runners that I just stayed
with throughout the run. Sometimes I ran shoulder to shoulder with them and
sometimes I just kept the pace right behind them. We chatted and had a great
time finishing the long run. Surprisingly I did really well for my first very
long run of 18.4K. My team was very supportive and gave me a lot of positive
feedback that I had done very well and had easily kept up. I really enjoyed
being with our group.
After that run I had greater confidence in myself. My
goal originally was to be able to cross the finish line. After my long run I
realized I could complete the race and actually do it with a decent time of not
more than 2.5 hours. But then when I had another long run a few weeks later and
ran 21.1 Km with time of 2:11.00 I aimed for finishing the ½ marathon in just
less than 2 hours. I was told I was very ambitious with my time as a first time
runner.
But then in
October 9th, I started feeling something sharp under my left toe. I
took my sock off to examine my toe as it felt like I had a sharp thorn stuck in
my toe but there was nothing. Then I checked the carpet. I went for my speed
training but did not do very well and I attributed it to being tired and not
being a night runner. I did not complete the training as I was feeling a sharp
pain travelling from my left glute to hamstring down to my toe. I rested that
night and did not work out for the next 7 days. I did research online and found
out I had sciatica that is common in runners and started doing specific yoga
and using foam rollers. I was fearful that I may not be able to get back where
I was. I started running again. In one of my long runs I had to run very slowly
as I had severe cramps coming and going. Then my goal changed again. I wanted
only to finish the race.
The speed training and the long runs had helped me
to improve my time and become a better runner. The last long run before the
race I felt great. It was a beautiful sunny chilly fall morning. We were all
feeling happy and had a good run.
The team headed out for a huge breakfast to
celebrate our accomplishments. The atmosphere was filled with optimism,
laughter, appreciation and we all got a #1Cup full of jelly beans.
The day of
the race I was only thinking positive thoughts and thinking of Lanni Marchant.
I had tweeted telling her that I find re-assurances through her experience. She
was able to overcome her injury and bounce back, finishing her marathon with
record-breaking results. Although my goal was not to break any records, Lanni’s
story was a great source of inspiration for me.
But there was also another woman who became my
beacon of hope that day. Ruth is an experienced runner with some good ½
marathon races under her belt. Her warm smile and genuine caring attitude is
hard to miss. I was running with my daughter and she was running with her
daughter. We both had conversations that they would finish before us. I started
my race really well and felt good except that I had to stop for the bloody
bathroom break. I decided after the 1st bathroom break that this
will be costly and ridiculous. I told myself, “You have to find mental
toughness and defeat the urge of wanting to go”. That was that.
I kept running behind Ruth and her daughter. My
daughter had pulled away and I could see her bright neon colored top with her
long hair. I kept saying you go baby.
Then around 17.5 Km I started feeling small
contractions happening in my hamstrings. During the last 3 Km, the pain became
steady and was growing in intensity. Ruth became my beacon of hope. I told
myself that as long as I have her in front of me, I’d be OK. She was running a
steady pace and I just kept up with her. I had a few options: to stop, to walk,
or to just keep going. I kept going but fixed my eyes on Ruth. I said, “Just
keep up with her. This is just another Sunday long run.” Then just like that, I
saw the huge clock showing 2:08 as I was passing it and I crossed the finish
line. Our daughters were waiting for us with open arms and smiles. I made my
way to Ruth first and gave her a big hug and said thank you. I then turned to
my daughter and told her I was proud of her and she said she was proud of me.
We took some pictures and there were more hugs and kind words being exchanged.
"Ruth and I with our lovely daughters"
I told my daughter that I was in trouble and needed
to put warm clothes on and that I needed some pain killers. She ran to the
medics who said they did not have meds and could not give me any. They did not
have cold packs or hot packs! Ruth came to my rescue with Ibuprofen. I had my
post recovery drink I had made that morning. I had some bananas and told my
daughter that if I stop moving that that will be the end of me. We started
walking so very slowly towards home. It was only a few kilometers but that was
just what I needed. As we were walking, I told my daughter that if it were not
for the cramps I would have finished in under 2 hours. Later on when we plugged
our watches to analyze our time, this was confirmed. My last 3K was the
slowest.
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Right after the race - "Smile is pushing through pain"
For me, running this half marathon was very special
at many levels:
It is true that I have been running for a sometime.
In fact, running for me is a form of therapy. This is not just a cliché. You
see, I have been dealing with depression for the longest time. I can’t take any
meds as my body is very sensitive and reacts forcibly. I run to get rid of
whatever is on my mind. To remove the fog, the stress, the sadness, the anger,
the ambiguity, the doubt, the confusion, and whatever else that depression
brings with it. When I run, I feel free. I don’t have to answer to anyone. I’m
running away from everything metaphorically until I feel I’m ready to go back.
I have been going through some difficult stuff in my
personal life for the past few years and running this race was very symbolic
for me. For the first time in my life, I faced the enemy (pain) and did not run
away from it. I finished the race on my terms. This was my very first big race
of any kind. I ran my 21.1K and I got my time of 2:06 as per my Garmin. Nobody can take my time away! Nobody can take away the
feeling I had at the end of the race either. It was not happiness or excitement
per se but rather a feeling of gratitude, accomplishment, empowerment, strength
during vulnerable times, and overall knowledge that I have been a survivor
since I can remember. And it’s that ability that allowed me to run my race.
Unfortunately, my time and race were posted wrong
that night. I contacted the organizers
saying I was right behind my friend and they had seen me running and finishing the race. They have not been able to provide a straight answer and to fix the results.
The race results show me as a walker with a time of 3.5 hours. I was told my
chip must have been triggered due to close proximity to sensors. It has been very disappointing in terms of
posted results and how it was handled.
I literally got an email while I was writing this blog and was told they watched my video and my time will be recorded as 2:07.53. It took 11 days but
I literally got an email while I was writing this blog and was told they watched my video and my time will be recorded as 2:07.53. It took 11 days but
For me, my personal
achievement is the highlight of that day. I know I ran 21.1K and I know I did
really well for a middle aged rookie with injured hamstrings. I plan to run other half
marathon races. My daughter and I will be running our fist full marathon
together next fall as well.
It is about FREEDOM!
Image Credit: Truerunner.tumblr.com
Human beings are made up of flesh and blood,
and a miracle fiber called courage.
-George Patton
and a miracle fiber called courage.
-George Patton
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